Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books

secretromancejunkie
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Reading Promises Linger - Promises 1 - Sarah McCarty

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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Jul 22, 2018 17:45:45 GMT -7 Banana Boat likes this

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Post by secretromancejunkie on Jul 22, 2018 17:45:45 GMT -7

Reading A Rogue's Proposal by Stephanie Laurens.

"Her eyes widened, pupils distending; her lips parted ......"

Her eyes distended?? Really?? I kept picturing a cartoon character with its eyes jumping out of the sockets in surprise.

kc
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Now working on a gift for a retiree heading for Florida: "I'd rather have Seashells than Snowflakes"

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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Jul 23, 2018 12:51:39 GMT -7 Banana Boat and kareni like this

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Post by kc on Jul 23, 2018 12:51:39 GMT -7

Reading Eva Devon's A Duke for the Road:

"But you must," Drake protested, a sardine brow arching as he leaned forward then looked over towards Harry discretely."

I have a mental image of a sardine draped across his forehead!!! Sure she meant sardonic & spell-check struck, but should have edited!

tealadytoo Chief Forum Dignitary Posts: 2,285	Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 5, 2018 7:45:45 GMT -7 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tealadytoo on Aug 5, 2018 7:45:45 GMT -7 "All of You" by Sarah Monzon. The hero "diluted himself". Is that what happens if you drink too much?
	You can't get a cup of tea big enough or a book long enough to suit me. C. S. Lewis

flipoid
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 5, 2018 18:47:55 GMT -7 Banana Boat, secretromancejunkie, and 2 more like this

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Post by flipoid on Aug 5, 2018 18:47:55 GMT -7

Jul 23, 2018 12:51:39 GMT -7 kc said:

Reading Eva Devon's A Duke for the Road:

"But you must," Drake protested, a sardine brow arching as he leaned forward then looked over towards Harry discretely."

I have a mental image of a sardine draped across his forehead!!! Sure she meant sardonic & spell-check struck, but should have edited!

She also used the wrong "discrete." She meant "discreetly."

tealadytoo
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 8, 2018 4:05:40 GMT -7 Banana Boat, secretromancejunkie, and 2 more like this

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Post by tealadytoo on Aug 8, 2018 4:05:40 GMT -7

From the blurb for "Winter Dreams", in which our heroine is preparing for the Iditarod: "Laura is well-prepared for the riggers of training". Dog harness riggers? Or is the race fixed, perhaps?

You can't get a cup of tea big enough or a book long enough to suit me.

C. S. Lewis

agreads
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 8, 2018 12:29:13 GMT -7 secretromancejunkie and tealadytoo like this

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Post by agreads on Aug 8, 2018 12:29:13 GMT -7

Aug 8, 2018 4:05:40 GMT -7 tealadytoo said:

From the blurb for "Winter Dreams", in which our heroine is preparing for the Iditarod: "Laura is well-prepared for the riggers of training". Dog harness riggers? Or is the race fixed, perhaps?

Sounds like erotica to me.

kareni
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 11, 2018 19:20:34 GMT -7 Banana Boat and bonnieg like this

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Post by kareni on Aug 11, 2018 19:20:34 GMT -7

I don't think this one has been posted ~

Fierce Attraction (Attraction Series Book 3) by J B Heller
www.amazon.com/Fierce-Attraction-Book-3-ebook/dp/B01IBVXAFQ/ref=zg_bs_digital-text_f_41?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=N6VQ3HRE2B3RR3Z7711M

"He's an ex-military alpha with one thing on his mind...

She's an introverted librarian with a dark and painful past.

Axel has never been the jealous sort.
Until he finds himself the last man standing amongst his close nit group of friends.
He's ready to change his perpetual single status."

Clearly a lice ridden group of friends!

Regards,
Kareni

JaniceC
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 16, 2018 22:29:11 GMT -7 Banana Boat, secretromancejunkie, and 2 more like this

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Post by JaniceC on Aug 16, 2018 22:29:11 GMT -7

Finding the Way by Ahren Sanders. Editing is terrible. 71% in they are having a serious conversation about how much he loves her then "two tears fall down my cheeks as the levity of his words sink in.". The levity?

Be careful what you wish for, it might just come true.

Natasha
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 17, 2018 8:48:49 GMT -7 secretromancejunkie likes this

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Post by Natasha on Aug 17, 2018 8:48:49 GMT -7

I rarely read Paranormal/shifters etc, but @banana Boat listed this freebie and thought I would read the excerpt as follows and not knowing whether the word "dragonling" is PNR colloquialism or not made me laugh so hard that got tears in my eyes.

EXCERPT: A monster. Yet a ten-thousand-year treaty will die with me, if I don’t spawn a DRAGONLING to take my place.Kiss of a Dragon (Fallen Immortals 1) - Paranormal Fairytale Romance

Here comes the sun even though I love that rainy day feeling!

Josie
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 19, 2018 11:13:40 GMT -7 secretromancejunkie and bonnieg like this

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Post by Josie on Aug 19, 2018 11:13:40 GMT -7

This is from Invitation to Ruin,

"The special license that Anthony had obtained eliminated the necessity of reading the bands..." Really? The reading of bands? Umm, I think you meant reading the banns. All I can picture is the musical band getting read to.

flipoid
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 19, 2018 11:52:57 GMT -7 Banana Boat, secretromancejunkie, and 3 more like this

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Post by flipoid on Aug 19, 2018 11:52:57 GMT -7

Aug 19, 2018 11:13:40 GMT -7 Josie said:

This is from Invitation to Ruin,

"The special license that Anthony had obtained eliminated the necessity of reading the bands..." Really? The reading of bands? Umm, I think you meant reading the banns. All I can picture is the musical band getting read to.

Either that, or some specially engraved rubber bands!

agreads
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 27, 2018 23:13:00 GMT -7 Banana Boat, secretromancejunkie, and 1 more like this

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Post by agreads on Aug 27, 2018 23:13:00 GMT -7

Fair warning, not hilarious so much as one of the more disgusting descriptives I've ever heard.

I'm rereading Taltos by Anne Rice and came across this "gem", which I can't believe I forgot reading the first time.

SPOILER: Click to show

"Where the hell was Stuart? Damn you, Stuart. You ran like a ruptured duck."

Natasha
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Aug 28, 2018 7:19:36 GMT -7 agreads, Banana Boat, and 1 more like this

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Post by Natasha on Aug 28, 2018 7:19:36 GMT -7

Aug 27, 2018 23:13:00 GMT -7 agreads said:

Fair warning, not hilarious so much as one of the more disgusting descriptives I've ever heard.

Not surprised that this came from Anne Rice and obviously not an animal lover...IMO!!!!

Here comes the sun even though I love that rainy day feeling!

JaniceC
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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Sept 6, 2018 18:54:52 GMT -7 Banana Boat, secretromancejunkie, and 1 more like this

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Post by JaniceC on Sept 6, 2018 18:54:52 GMT -7

not really hilarious but ……… in Imperfect Wings
www.amazon.com/Imperfect-Wings-Book-1-ebook/dp/B00MCYLVUU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1536285093&sr=8-1&keywords=imperfect+wings"] at about 60% in she's on a horse and Jonas holds out a jacket for TJ to slip on. She then leans down to kiss him on the cheek. I figure he must be 7 - 8 feet tall to help her into the jacket and then he shrunk so she could lean down. This follows changing her backstory a couple of times.

Last Edit: Sept 6, 2018 18:56:27 GMT -7 by JaniceC

Be careful what you wish for, it might just come true.

JaniceC Veteran Forum Connoisseur Posts: 709	Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books Sept 11, 2018 12:36:13 GMT -7 secretromancejunkie, Natasha, and 1 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by JaniceC on Sept 11, 2018 12:36:13 GMT -7 reading Being Brooke by Emma Hart in Chapter 5 "a slight frown marring her bra". How does a frown mar a bra? that almost rhymes!
	Be careful what you wish for, it might just come true.

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Hilarious mistakes in mostly self-published books

Post by secretromancejunkie on Jul 22, 2018 17:45:45 GMT -7

Post by kc on Jul 23, 2018 12:51:39 GMT -7

Post by tealadytoo on Aug 5, 2018 7:45:45 GMT -7

Post by flipoid on Aug 5, 2018 18:47:55 GMT -7

Post by tealadytoo on Aug 8, 2018 4:05:40 GMT -7

Post by agreads on Aug 8, 2018 12:29:13 GMT -7

Post by kareni on Aug 11, 2018 19:20:34 GMT -7

Post by JaniceC on Aug 16, 2018 22:29:11 GMT -7

Post by Natasha on Aug 17, 2018 8:48:49 GMT -7

Post by Josie on Aug 19, 2018 11:13:40 GMT -7

Post by flipoid on Aug 19, 2018 11:52:57 GMT -7

Post by agreads on Aug 27, 2018 23:13:00 GMT -7

Post by Natasha on Aug 28, 2018 7:19:36 GMT -7

Post by JaniceC on Sept 6, 2018 18:54:52 GMT -7

Post by JaniceC on Sept 11, 2018 12:36:13 GMT -7